The Poorman's Off Chassis Restoration.Com
Car Nose Logo
Photo Gallery
Web Cam
Destructive Tests
Back Button


    In 2006 I had an abundance of things to do: restore the Firebird, work on my comedy, and shoot scenes for an
independent film about my pathetic life. 

    In November 2005, I started preparing to restore the Firebird. I wanted to document the restoration with narrated
video. Realizing the task would take years to do I settled for what you see on the video page. If you ever try
to produce a video with narration, you'll quickly learn to respect what you see on TV. For every minute you watch,
it took about one hour to produce if things went well.
In December, the disassembly started. During the
whole restoration I only broke three bolts. The
lower fender bolts gave me a fit. Then again
when you have a torch most of those
problems can be solved. With the car 
completed in May 2006 and the last 
unemployment check cashed, it was fire
season again. Once again time to
replenish the low cash reserves. 
68 Firebird fender removal
Screen shot from the fender removal video.
Aside from the restoration parts sent to me. A few parts that were incorrect or just junk. What really 
burrowed under my skin was the barking neighbors dog. Every time I walked back and forth to the garage, when
tools were dropped in the garage, and at 3 am while I was sleeping. You would think that after getting a warning
from Animal Control once, you would fix the problem. Apparently these people are deaf, and dumb. Upon my third call
to Animal Control I signed a compliant. The Animal Control officer tells me to get pictures for court. Heck, I figured
I'll do one better. I have the video camera right here. Opportunity knocked; so I climbed on the fence to get my 
evidence. Yelling, smile to the lady that finally came out to get the dog after 10 minutes of barking. Two hours
later the BPD is calling me on my cell phone. "Where are you?" It seems that the neighbor wants to have me 
charged with video voyeurism. After explaining the truth to the officer no charges were filed. 
NOW THE GLOVES ARE OFF!! That dog barking again at 3 am. I filed another complaint.
This time they came banging on my door, whining, "why are you picking on me?" Then, they say the dog is barking
because the house was burglarized in November. The best is "Are you the one that robbed us?" "Is that why the 
dog is barking at you?" All I could think of at that point was "What did they take? Your cookies and cake you
fat bitch?!" I always find myself in positions where I have to bite my tongue, so I just asked if they were out
of their f------ minds and slammed the door. 
tree clippings
The neighbors decide to trim the trees and throw the clippings
onto my property. In the eyes of the law, that's Injury to Property.
Punishable up to six months in prison if convicted. After a week
the BPD, finally showed up and made them clean it up.
Needless to says these inbred morons were convicted twice
for having a nuisance dog.
The dog still barks, but I don't have the time to show up in court
at this time.
I feel that my comedy is coming along. I was booked to open a couple of shows at The Comedy Spot in 
Scottsdale, AZ. I thought that by Arizona being a larger state I would have more opportunity for comedy than 
Boise. (Wrong once again!)
While I was in Arizona staying with my parents, they had me earn my room and board by painting 
the house. It took three months to paint. The simplest task can be so over dramatized. What an ordeal!
I guess that's why my brother was nowhere to be found during that three month period. At least I had the chance
to enjoy the pool without him splashing me and trying to stick his wet finger in my ear while I watched Dirty Jobs
on the 65" HD TV.
I have shot about 70 minutes of my independent
film. Once again the respect and appreciation
for movie making I've obtained is immense. I 
know the few people that I've asked to help me
with it and appear in it have been great. Of 
course you have a few that tell you they want 
to help, but never show up. Then again they
are doing it for free and people don't even show 
when they're getting paid. 

Remember that if you don't have a poorman's
T-shirt, someone else will be driving
that Firebird. Don't make it easy for them
get a T-shirt now!

Thanks for your support.

Salt water pool
My inheritance. A salt water pool.